The shit hits the floor in Chile

From Her

 **Disclaimer**- Please be aware you may be offended or totally grossed out by the following content. If so, I apolgise in advance but this story MUST be  told.

Well it goes like this. Before we boarded for Buenos Aires today I was waiting patiently in a line to go the toilet. Suddenly this frantic asian women ran into the toilet with her hands up in the air waving  and fighting her way to the front of the line (in the process nudging me hard in the back!) She was yelling something but I had no idea what it was cause, it wasnt English, but I was about to find out why!

I ended up in the toilet next to her and it was one of those loo’s that had the big opening at the bottom. As I looked over I was not prepared for what I was about to see. Her shoes lay on the floor next to her trousers with a few large piles of runny poo! LOL! Oh my god – it was gross.

All I could here was this poor lady hurridly pulling the toilet paper out from the holder wiping between her toes and trying to mop up the contents from her arse that now lay strewn all over the cubicle floor. I just couldnt believe what I was witnessing, no wonder she was in a such a hurry.

I walked out of the toilet with this image burnt into my mind, I felt so sick !!! But the bloody worst thing of all was as I walked out of the toilet and back to where Shaun was I could see a trail of poo leading into the toilet. I dont know what happened to this lady, but seriously, it couldnt have been any worse than what it was.

Unfortunately I dont have any pictures to show you but Im sure you all get my drift.

Hope your not reading this while eating breakfast!!

Until next time, or until any more pooey stories, over and out xxxx

Chile

From her

Hope this post finds you all well.

Santiago, Chile – it’s a pretty cool place! Besides having a little trouble getting our body clocks adjusted we have managed a good gander around the city.

I guess the place isn’t too different to any other big city but the thing that strikes you the most is the culture. The same culture you generally experience in most parts of Europe where everyone hangs out in the Plazza’s having an icecream watching the people go by, watching the artists in the street. Whether they are bellowing out the word of god,

drawing a street mural on the pavement,

a puppeteer moving his puppet to music

or listening to a comedian do his act (not that we understood jack!).

They truly love it and they support it! They give generously to these people and respect their art.

Shaun and I spent hours in one particular Plazza just watching it all happen wishing that Perth could adopt a little piece of this! What would it take? Or do we have it and I’ve just missed it!

We stayed in Santiago for a couple of days and then moved onto Valparaiso where we are now.  It’s a quaint port town that use to be one of the major ports of South America back in the hey day. It’s a crumbling city which oozes charm.

It is covered in some of the best graffiti I have seen, not that I’m an expert but looks shit hot to me.

Yesterday we went to a beach called Reneca which was just on the outskirts of another coastal town called Vina del Mar, 5km down the road. Of course I staked out the best Empanadas’ in town. I waited 40 minutes for these Empanadas’ but shit they were good! Shaun had mince, onion

and I had cheese and crab.

Ok so its probably a bit of a weird combo but I love Crab and cheese with anything is always good. I repeat, ALWAYS good!

After we stuffed our faces we found a good surf spot . I sat on the beach performing the tasks of any good surfy wife – sun baked and read. I gotta say, it was pretty dam good, but it got Chili in Chile. I’m so funny!!! It was weird, the sun was blaring, but the wind was freezing. I looked around and all these chicks had there incy bincy bikini’s on with jumpers. The funniest thing of all was the beach was rammed with people but hardly anyone in the water. I found out why when I placed my big toe in there – F****king freezing. Needless to say I didn’t make it into the water.

Anyway so that’s the state of the going’s on over here peeps. Feeling like im getting a flu today so been huddled up in the hostel with my wifi. It hasn’t been working for a couple of days so couldn’t have started functioning at a more opportune time.

Oh by the way I had to share the below picture with you. We are staying in a room which pretty much has no curtains so its beastly light in the morning. I came to bed after Shaun last night only to find him wearing his pretty aqua blue eye mask. How gay does he look!!! No offence to my gay friends of course!

Yes I’ve been wearing one too, but that’s not the point. I’ve had to wear ear plugs aswell because the bloody seagulls are so loud. They make a strange sound, I thought they were Turkeys. I know that sounds like I’m dense, but I swear, they dont sound like that in Oz. I’m going now before I do myself anymore favours.

I will leave you with a few thoughts floating through my mind.

Noticeable traits/characteristics about the Chileans:

*They are very proud of their country and its people  
*They don’t care much for travelers. Not that they are impolite or rude, I guess they are just indifferent to you
*They respect and love the arts
*They don’t mind a beer or 10!
*They love to party and stay up very late! 
*They’re generous

Things Im loving about travelling:

*I love that I have time to think about life, enjoy it, take it in
*Waking up at 9.30
*Meeting some funny people
*Seeing some cool stuff

Things I’m not fussed about travelling:

*Sharing bathrooms
*Seeing homeless dogs – can’t handle it! I’ve already cried in the middle of the street twice.

From him

Finally underway. The two days in Santiago were an easygoing introduction to the continent with friendly Santiguens and a well developed infrastructure making the first 48 jet lagged affected hours anything but hectic.

It’s a really easy city to walk around with very authentic Latin undertone despite the fact of the obvious ‘westernization’ i.e. shitloads of fast food outlets and a very prevalent mall culture in which the residents seem to indulge with gusto.

The plazas were cool, with big public squares surrounded by grandiose architecture and plenty of live performances and street art in which again local involvement and respect is on display for all with there performances. Santaguens embrace their arty city!

We are now in Valparaiso which is on the coast about 1.5 hours from Santiago. At ground level on the coast line it is a very common looking place with dirty streets, banks, bus stations etc. The pleasant surprise is in the hills which surround and contain half of the city.

It’s a labyrinth of cobblestone streets and stairways that would give any GPS a seizure, and any spare wall is bombed with mad looking graffiti. Not that shit type that is scrawled on the wall by some pissed dickhead usually involving a cock and balls. But the type where the artist is probably had all day and a good dose of magic mushroom to complete it. Feral beauty!

Got some good waves yesterday on a punchy little right hander called Renaca.

Had to hire a wet suit though as my bits shriveled up as soon as my big toe touched the water. Will go back tomorrow as every hombre and its pero were there.

Hasta luego

I feel like I’m 18 again!

From her

I love to travel. In my 33 years on this planet I have been to 31 countries out of a possible 230! That’s not bad if you ask me, almost a country a year!

 The thing I like the most is the freedom to do whatever you want and experience life unlike your own. It’s amazing to witness how some people live – it really does blow your mind. In order to afford (only just) these travels, Shaun and I are backpacking, it keeps the cost down and we get to meet people along the way. However carrying a backpack means limited stuff which equates to dark practical clothes so you can’t tell if there dirty and that dry quickly after washing them in the hostel sink.

Call me vain, but one thing I really do miss, is my wardrobe of shoes and clothes (family and friends goes without saying). Yes I know, there just clothes, but what can I say, I love them. So when I had to buy trekking shoes just before I left I was most certainly devastated that I had to spend my money on THE ugliest shoes known to man. If I didn’t look like I had short legs before, it certainly does now. See exhibit A.

Shoes aside, we are now already to rock en roll. We’ve been in NZ since Christmas eve and in 2 nights we fly out. NZ has been pretty groovy, we have relaxed heaps and caught up on some sleep. Been practicing my photography too. Take a gander.

Today we arrived in Wellington where we fly out from after leaving Shaun’s family (there were loads of tears!) and we are now in our first hostel. It feels weird to be travelling like this again, it’s been awhile! We are currently sitting in the common room which has wi-fi, shared kitchen and loads of couches. Exhbit B

There are heaps of people sitting around eating cheap food e.g. baked beans on toast, chicken nuggets with a cucumber, mint and yoghurt dip etc etc. Its sooo funny, I feel like I’m 18 again. But we can’t laugh, we are in the same budget boat.

Today we had to go the supermarket to buy dinner. While we were wandering around I said to Shaun “I feel like I’m poor ”. We pissed ourselves most of the way around the supermarket with our hair brain ideas for saving money. Shaun told me it was ‘character building’., mmm not sure ABOUT that especially seens I have to eat scrambled eggs for dinner. Maybe I wont come back pudgy after all.

Ok stay tuned for more xxxx

Why?

From her

Shaun has wanted to go to South America for as long as we have been together – 7 years. With building a house for the last 2 years and getting married last November it has been pushed to the back of the ‘to do’ list, but finally we’re going!

On 14th Jan we are set of to wander the huge continent of South America with 2 backpacks, a surfboard and my beautiful baby, my Canon 5d. Im truly excited about what we are about to see, the people we are going to meet, the adventure we will have and hopefully produce some awesome pics. Of course the not working for 3.5 months is also a huge bonus.

So stay tuned everyone for some funny stories and great pics.

Smudge/Mel/Missy/Mrs Mills

From him

Going to South America was always part of the deal. The deal consisting of my moving to Perth to set up permanently and us getting married, make up your mind but ill take that as a deal settled fairly. Add to this the building of a rather large house and we are both busting our guts to uproot and hit the road again.

It may be some time before this happens again so the motto will be ‘Have a go at anything’.

Adios Amigos, hasta conocemos otra vez.